Old Boys show the young boys how NOT TO DO IT!

Saturday 28th January 2017 @ Heartlands Academy

Jersey 2017 Fundraising Match

Friends of The Ton 0 -1 Friends and Family of The Ton

Friends and Family of The Ton 3 – 3 Birmingham Badgers

Friends of The Ton 2 – 0 Birmingham Badgers


After the euphoria of watching the real Ton stars do so well on the final day of the Daniel Sturridge Cup, it was left to the ‘old boys’ to take centre stage! With all players donating £10 for the right to give themselves an almost certain asthma attack (and possibly much worse – read on!), the games were played in a great spirit and brought memories of ‘what we could have been’ flooding back for all players.

The first match saw the team made up predominantly of Ton parents and players from present and yesteryear tear apart a team made up of my mates. In the lead up to the game, all but one of my mates had made it clear they were “fat”, “unfit” or had “dodgy knees and a knackered back”. Such feedback filled me with dread as the ref blew to start the game. I was right to be concerned. In fact, had it not been for my superb keeping, we would have suffered an embarrassing defeat. I kept the score respectable and carried the team on my aching back. In the end a fluky Tonn goal gave the red’s three points.

I know my mates won’t read this so I can say what I like!

Next up was a real barnstorming encounter, with the result swinging both ways during the 35 minutes. The red’s took a two goal lead early on and seemed to have knocked the stuffing out of the Badgers. However following a few puffs on some strategically placed inhalers and a couple of knowing looks from some strategically place embarrassed wives and children, the Badgers found their second wind and stormed back into the game to lead 3-2. However with the ref checking his watch and preparing to blow for full time, 2012 Ton captain Jayden Ward, who had tormented both teams throughout the afternoon, burst through to snatch an equaliser with the last kick of the game.

Following some home truths, my mates were determined to roll back the clock to the glory days of 2000 – 2002 by taking all three points against the Badgers. Now more stable at the back, the lads popped the ball around (every now and again) and scored two goals to take a lead that the Badgers were unable to overturn on this occasion.

Then in the dying minutes of the game and with the goal gaping, Frank Junior (Ireland’s version of Neymar Junior) swung his legendary right foot at a delightful right wing ball, only to strike the air and collapse to the floor in a heap. As unscrupulous teammates mocked and laughed, Frank Junior hobbled off the pitch to a chorus of…well, nothing. Then after a 13 hour cool down in local watering holes, it was on to the local accident and emergency, who confirmed what our team doctor (our defender T-Dog is a doctor) failed to diagnose, namely a broken fibula (in two places).

He was never that good anyway.

A huge thank you to all of the players, supporters, raffle ticket sellers and the referee. Thanks to your hard work and effort we raised £360.41 toward the Jersey 2017 fund!

A special thank you to Matt for organising this game and for putting in so much effort to support the lads on their journey to the Channel Islands.

Up The Ton Parents and Friends!

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